English speakers often wonder whether to use his, her, or they when the gender of the person referenced is unknown, unspecified, or nonbinary. This guide explains standard grammatical patterns, evolving inclusive usage, and practical choices for professional, academic, and everyday contexts. You will find definitions, examples, style guidance, and decision points that remain useful over time, with an emphasis on clarity, respect, and audience awareness rather than fleeting conventions.
Standard meanings of his and her
Basic grammatical roles
His functions as both a possessive adjective (his book) and a possessive pronoun (the book is his). Her functions as a possessive adjective (her book) and a possessive pronoun (the book is hers). Both are also used as object pronouns (I saw him; I saw her). These forms align with singular third-person subjects and follow typical adjective-before-noun order in English.
Traditional usage patterns
In prescriptive grammar, his was commonly treated as the default singular pronoun for indefinite antecedents, as in, A doctor should listen to his patients. Many style guides now treat this as dated, recommending inclusive alternatives rather than assuming masculinity as the norm. Her appears in parallel contexts when the antecedent is explicitly female, for example, The nurse reviewed the patient’s file and her symptoms.
Singular they as a widely adopted alternative
Grammar and acceptability
Singular they (they/them/their) is used when the gender of a singular referent is unknown, irrelevant, or nonbinary. It is plural in form but commonly treated as singular in verb agreement (they are; their; them). Major dictionaries and style guides recognize singular they as standard, especially when a person requests it or when gender is unspecified.
| Pronoun form | Function in this context | Example |
|---|---|---|
| They (singular) | Subject | They are arriving later. |
| Their (singular) | Possessive adjective | We reviewed their application. |
| Theirs (singular) | Possessive pronoun | The report is theirs. |
| Them (singular) | Object | Please send it to them. |
When to choose they
Use singular they when you do not know the person’s gender, when the person uses they/them pronouns, or when you want to avoid unnecessary gender specification. For example, If a visitor asks for directions, tell them the shortest route. In formal writing, rephrase to avoid a singular they when a style authority requires it, but many modern style guides now endorse it as acceptable and inclusive.
Rephrasing strategies to avoid gendered pronouns
Use plural nouns or names
Replace singular indefinite pronouns with plural constructions or repeat the name. Instead of, Each participant should submit his report on time, say, All participants should submit their reports on time, or, Jordan should submit Jordan’s report on time. This preserves clarity while avoiding gendered assumptions.
Use passive or impersonal constructions
When appropriate, shift to passive voice or impersonal it constructions. Instead of, The candidate must defend his platform, prefer, The platform must be defended, or, Candidates must defend their platforms. Employ caution to overuse of passive voice, as it can reduce readability.
Select inclusive synonyms
Choose nouns and modifiers that avoid gendered pronouns entirely. For example, use police officer instead of policeman, first-year student instead of freshman, and partner instead of husband or wife where context allows. These choices support clarity and reduce the need to decide between his and her.
Choosing between his, her, and they in practice
Follow the person’s stated pronouns
Use the pronouns a person indicates, whether that is he/him, she/her, they/them, or another set. If you are unsure, ask respectfully or default to they/them while you confirm. Misgendering can damage trust and credibility, so correction and consistency matter more than initial assumptions.
Audience and register considerations
In highly formal or legally binding documents, consult the relevant style guide or legal standard in your region. For general business communications, academic writing, and public content, prioritize clarity and respect. When writing about historical usage, describe his as a once-common default while noting contemporary inclusive practices.
Balancing clarity and inclusivity
There is no single universal rule, but aim for constructions that readers can parse quickly without surprise. If a sentence becomes awkward with they, recast it. If a style guide in your field specifies otherwise, document that choice and apply it consistently across the same content.
Common pitfalls and how to avoid them
Mixing his and her as a compromise
Alternating his and her, or using his/her and s/he, can feel cluttered and may still exclude nonbinary readers. These approaches are generally less effective than rephrasing or using singular they where appropriate. Reserve explicit mention of both forms only when you are quoting or addressing an audience with specific expectations.
Assuming gender from context or appearance
Avoid assigning pronouns based on names, roles, or stereotypes. When in doubt, use they/them or ask for preferred pronouns. Consistent use of correct pronouns supports trust and reduces the risk of misgendering in ongoing communication.
Overcomplicating simple references
Not every sentence needs careful pronoun surgery. If the antecedent is clear and the reader’s gender is irrelevant, default to the simplest, most direct grammatical choice. Clarity and readability should guide whether you choose his, her, they, or a structural rewrite.
Practical examples across contexts
Everyday communication
When you leave a message for a colleague, say, Sam will follow up when they have the figures, or, Lee will follow up when Lee has the figures. Both options are clear, modern, and respectful when Sam or Lee’s pronouns are unknown.
Professional and academic writing
In reports and research, prefer plural subjects or rephrasing: Participants indicated their preferences. If a style guide in your discipline still prescribes generic he, note that usage explicitly and consider aligning with evolving inclusive standards in your field.
Customer-facing content and interfaces
Use consistent, neutral phrasing such as, If a user forgets their password, they can reset it. Avoid alternating gendered examples in microcopy, as this can suggest inconsistency or bias to observant readers.
Evolution of usage and style guidance
Historical norms and current trends
English has long used he as a so-called generic pronoun, but many contemporary writers view that as unnecessarily masculine-centered. The rise of singular they reflects broader inclusion efforts and recognition that language can evolve without sacrificing precision. Major publishers, organizations, and institutions increasingly codify inclusive pronoun guidance in style resources.
Staying current and consistent
Check your organization’s style guide, regional standards, and audience expectations before finalizing choices. When you adopt a practice, apply it consistently across content so readers can rely on predictable patterns. Document exceptions for quoting, legal requirements, or direct reproduction of source material.
Key considerations at a glance
- Respect individual pronouns: default to a person’s stated pronouns, when known.
- Use singular they when gender is unknown, irrelevant, or nonbinary, and when it supports clarity.
- Rephrase with plurals, names, or passive/impersonal structures to avoid gendered pronouns when needed.
- Avoid mixing his and her as a stylistic compromise; it can reduce readability and inclusivity.
- Prioritize consistency and clarity, adapting to audience, register, and organizational style guidance.
When context requires special handling
Legal, medical, and technical documentation
Some regulated documents may still require adherence to legacy style rules. In these cases, follow your organization’s compliance guidance and note any deviations in internal style notes. Where possible, choose rewrites that retain clarity without gendered assumptions.
Historical quotations and multilingual contexts
When quoting historical texts, preserve original pronoun usage and provide context if modern readers may find it surprising. In multilingual environments, align pronoun practices with dominant conventions in each language while maintaining respect for individual identity.